Thursday, June 22, 2017

One Night Stand ( Elrok's One Man Strike Against Coca-cola)


No,  not this kind of one night stand...

This is about sugary  sweetness!  About  lips locked to a bottle and sucking down Coca-cola.... legally laced with a clever cocaine substitute.  CAFFEINE!   The parents and faculty at our local school scoffed at the idea of allowing Coke vending machines on to the campus there.  Expressing love and care for their dear children,  they would not allow such an addictive and unhealthy drink to be so easily dispensed.  It would lead  to more childhood obesity,  diabetes, addiction  and poor nutrition as their unwitting naive little munchkins sucked it down as a quick-fix for that much needed adolescent caloric intake. Coca - COLA...go home!.  We will not have you here!

But then, the compassionate minded Coca-cola company offered something to the school that was sorely needed.  Needed  more than a healthy child.  Something bolder and brighter than your child's future. A new scoreboard!

That's right. The old scoreboard on the football field was becoming delapidated and impossible to repair.  The cost of a new one an unbearable burden!  Enter Coca Cola.  "We will get you that new scoreboard!"  ( graced with our logo of course)  Gesture enough to soften the local school board so that they allowed coke machines in all of the schools in the county.

Not one to succumb to such overbearing influences of a gigantic corporation....I stopped drinking Coke that day.  Nope.  No more!   I will not be run over by these legal pushers and they will have my business no more!

The next day...hoping to encourage some sort of 1960's -ish boycott against this giant.,...I emphatically denied my own brother's offer for an ice cold Coca-cola on a sweltering hot and sunshiney Florida day.  "No way!"  I told'im.   "Did you see what they did to get Coke in  the schools?  It was so obvious!  Devious bastards!   I'm never drinking Coke again!"   To which he mockingly replied "Ha!   Luke's one-man strike against Coca-cola!"

I paused for a moment....in a bit of angered disgust at the flippant nature of his comment.  Until I realized it profound.   Then, I slammed that Coca-Cola, squeezing the can as I chugged  it down in five foaming feverish and  addictive swallows .  My 'one night stand'  against the filthy conglomerate had ended.

And with it, an ideal.  That we , as a society, ...were still capable of making such a stand.  That  monetary value could never replace moral value and ethic. That the power to control large corporations, governments, and greedy tsar-ish bullies still remained in our collective souls. But we have sold it for an almighty dollar.

Gone is the boycott!  And with it,  unionized labor and the local fund drive. The community's  soul-driven power in these rituals seemingly arcane.  Our  voice handed over to  'governments', ....along with our ethics and  our  conscience.  Our right...and our will and ability to make a stand based on  our own collective morality,  willingly relinquished....

Thursday, May 25, 2017

Online Dating Tips for MEN

Online Dating TIPS;

#1-  Lie, Lie ...LIE!  About everything!  Your age, your income, your ejucation level. Your past, your present, your future.. your sexual preferences, your religion,  your politics!  Lie.

#2- Profile Pic;   Be SURE to post a pic from 15 years and 30 pounds ago.   No-one likes 'reality' if they are on an online dating site....so,  stick to the fantasy!  Post old pics, or ...if necessary,  fuzzy-up some old Tom Cruise pics. ( Be sure to be winking,  the ladies love this.)

#3-  Wine.  You love wine. If you hate wine,  you now LOVE wine,  and would like take her out for some wine sometime.  Women love their wine,  more than their men!  Get used to being second best . Sub-ordinate yourself to the WINE! You and your ever growing  love handles and male ego... you are no match for the wine.   This has become and always will be many  a woman's true lover.

#4-  Compliments.  Start with the hair,  then the eyes....and make some deep-thought bullcrap up about her 'soul'...like,  you think you can see it in her eyes or something,  or, you can somehow feel her fantastic personality and soul through simple typeface in an instant message or text. Now, it goes without saying, that  "some" women have no soul.  But look past that,  and enter the fantasy..

#5-  Chivalry:   Bring lots of money and spend it.  Chivalry lesson...DONE!

#6-  Walt Disney.  You love Disney World.  You... BELIEVE...IN FAIRY TALES!.  The whole princess meeting prince and galloping off into the sunset is REAL to women,  and especially Disney-fied indoctrinated American women. Do not deny them this fantasy.

#7- Pay for the date. Even if she offers to go Dutch...pay for the date! In general,  women think most men are cheapskates and douschebags.  In general,  they are probably right!  No need to further this hasty generalization.  Just pay for the date.  If a relationship springs from it,  it will be the cheapest thing you paid for in retrospect. Your soul is the real price you will pay.

#8- I hope you are still lying!  If  you are not able to keep up with your own good lies,   then at least exaggerate. No,  not about how much you can bench-press!  About the important things, ...  like your bank account, the size of your house, your philanthropic nature, your amicable divorce!   Your wine collection! And if you have small hands....try to keep them under the table or wear a long-sleeve shirt that is tight around the wrists. If you must give her your full name, mis-spell it or give her a nickname to hide your prison record or to throw her off on a background check..

#9-  Picking her up:  If you don't have a nice car...RENT one.  Unfortunately,  this will be one of the first and most important impressions about who you REALLY are! The car makes the man, as I always say.  Does not matter who is inside! If you ain't got it, rent it!

#10- Sunglasses.  Wear'em.  You DO NOT want her to see the insecure and panic stricken look in your eyes as you approach her.  Remember,  this is all about proliferating a fantasy.  The more you can hide about your real ogre-self...probably is going to work out for the best. Besides, sunglasses will hide the full-body-scans and extra-long stares at her boobs or ass that are instinctive to  us men.  If you catch yourself staring,  move in and remove a piece of lint from her dress at the shoulder.  She'll be lost in a small moment of embarrassment and maybe forget that you were measuring up her ass like that little gold frame that measured the "Grinches" heart ...that grew three sizes in that one day...

Well,  I hope that helps , fellas.  Hey...I am there for ya!   Good luck, and remember...this little oxymoron :  " Stay true to the fantasy! ".  cya's

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

What Percent Nuts Are You?


     I have  been graced .  Today, ....I finally found  some solace.  Some peace -of- mind!  Everything is okay....I'm okay.    It's all okay, now..

     I'm sure you have had those times when you wonder about yourself.  Maybe even doubt?  Those times when you feel a little "different" than everybody else?, ...'eerily unique' perhaps?  And somewhat ....alone...........

 I started to think. Maybe.....just maybe.... I am 'different' ...because I am batshit-crazy.   A flippin' loon!  A nutjob.  Bananas! Bonkers! Mental.  A basket case! Not playing with a full deck?  Off my rocker?  Lights are on but no-one's home?

    And then....I met her.  She appeared as a charming  and gentle old lady,  ...slowly approaching my vehicle in the street as if to kindly request a small rest on my car's side-mirror as she made her way across.  She grabbed my mirror with the palm of her wrinkled old  hand, and let out a small hacking cough. Then she sighed and leaned in..... pulling her  granny wired-rimmed glasses to the edge of her nose.

     Glaucoma....or cataracs.....or both ..., covered her once blue eyes...and her now foggy lenses blurred the entrance to that cliche'd  'gateway to the soul'.     But she was in there....somewhere.   Or was she?

     What came next was the most sad-sorry painful rambling diatribal story of her  tired old life. The  2 minutes and thirty-five seconds it took her to ' lay it on me 'while stopped in the street,  seemed more like an hour-and- a half.
     She was abused as a young girl, beaten by her ex-husband, married thrice, broke, soon-to-be-homeless, sick, getting sicker,  and wished for Death to come soon if he was crazy enough to take her. She had already died on an operating table once,  but God told her it wasn't her time. Her neighbors constantly spread false and malicious rumors about how she had murdered her own Mother,  and they told hateful, vicious lies to everyone about how she's an ex 'ho and drug addict.   They all tell their kids to STAY AWAY from her 'cause she's a crazy old nutjob.  The kids in the neighborhood constantly jinkle the wind chimes on her back porch just to aggravate her. Then they  knock on her front door and run  away.  They tried to poison her dog and she's had to call the cops on every one of them at one time or another.  She has LUPUS which is a terrible disease and it is  driving her insane!  She goes to Walmart for hugs. Her brother abused her,  but when she called the cops on him...her Ma just said..." but that's my son!"  After dropping out of high school as a teenager,  she spent six years as a whore at a truck-stop down the street until she finally got a job at the Waffle House where she sold crystal meth once in awhile in the back parking lot.

     She's done with meth and men, and with people in general...because people are just  shitty! She had an aneurysm and curses  the doctors  for not turning the blood back on in time. She gets 16 dollars a month for food stamps which 'ain't much but she'll take it! '.., and she was screwed  by a loan guy  from Wells Fargo who suckered  her into a reverse mortgage on her home and she is gonna lose it in 90-days and be homeless. She can't afford her prescriptions any more  because every year the prices go "up-up UP!"  (she rolls her one good eye and gestures toward the sky)  She lives with her sister who wants to kill her, and her dog is about to die and when her dog dies she is going to go too because she just can't handle no more than that.

     For some curious   reason,  she felt I would be a willing listener to her tragic life story.   Or maybe, just maybe....she felt an aura of kindred spirit and on-the-edge comradery when our sad lives intersected that day. Perhaps  she was the cross-bars before the tracks of an impending train wreck . It seemed as though  she had seen the likes of me before....on the days when  she rode her  crazy-train heading to Crazy Town. But at least on this day, only one of us was holding the ticket to the final destination!
 Maybe I still had a chance...

     Now,  I am not sure if this lady is  entirely crazy.  But maybe she is 'mostly' crazy? ... Or 'kinda' crazy?  Or going crazy , ..returning from crazy?  One-hundred percent crazy, or just 90 percent??

    Every once in a while,   I meet someone who has  just-a-little higher percentage crazy than me....and I feel okay again.  Like.... I am not THAT freakin' crazy!  ...so ,  I am STILL... okay!

     And after a  good look around...at my bosses,  my co-workers, my neighbors, the clerk at 7-11, or at some poor empty  ambitious soul who has made his worthless job his signature on life....I realize,  we are ALL a 'little bit crazy'.....just some more than others.

Now tell me...What percent crazy are you?

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Don't Be Afraid!

I have made the mistake.   Of propping up a mere man in my mind,  for his seemingly infinite reservoir of knowledge.

He knows everything!  Got a question?  He will answer, and with emphatic authority!  Have a dilemma?  He is here to guide you through it,  using his bastion of deductive logic and retrieving solutions from his very own bottomless sea of  'life experiences'.  Can't find an answer?  You will always find one with him! Don't be afraid to ask.

But be afraid of the answer!  His nature... will not deny you an authoritive answer to ANY question. Even if he is clueless.    A know-it-all and jack-of-all-trades, ...one step away from bullshit artist.  A developed psychosis for which even he is unaware.

But you will become aware!  When you attempt to apply his answers... and the wrong information gleaned from his fearful  behavior comes back to bite you in the ass.

Fearful?  Well, yes!  He is afraid to admit he does not know,  and so will feed you any bullcrap answer to get through his clueless moment.

It's okay to 'not know' sometimes.  Sometimes,  the right answer to a question is not some made up conjectural bullshit contrived for our trusting and gullible consumption. Sometimes,   the right answer is " I don't know,  and I'm not afraid to admit it! "

Don't be afraid!  ....to admit when you just... don't....know.  It is the first and most important step in finding the real answer...

Sunday, March 5, 2017

That Chair is Not Empty

This framed sentiment was proudly mounted over the dinner table when we were kids. If there was ever an empty chair at the dinner table...I imagined Jesus Christ himself was sitting in it. I wonder sometimes, what other effects of being raised in a devoutly Catholic household might have had. Besides the genuinely beautiful lessons of love, honor, reverance, sacrifice and soul...and a sweet little Baby Jesus.....there was also a bleeding and scarred, tortured and thorny crowned Jesus, a picture instilled in us from infancy. Also , apocalyptic floods ,brotherly murders, real as well as metaphorical sacrificial lambs.And of course, Hell itself...with visions of fire and demons and pure evil. Holy and unholy Ghosts. Exorcisms and the strange and haunting dreams of St.John in the Book of Revelation! I can remember the effect of those potent images presented to us as children, and just sometimes wonder if the effects weren't somewhat traumatizing. Just wondering...

Friday, March 3, 2017

What Makes a Grown Man Cry

What Makes a Grown Man Cry

A grown man. Stoic and unflinching. Confident and steadfast. Accumulated knowledge...experience..wisdom. Able to anticipate and prepare for almost any circumstance. Blocking and channeling the chemistry that might lead to a tear's production. Guiding the torrents of would-be anguish to his reservoir of strength.
Silvering hairs proof that his crying days are over. Childhood days when he ran to his mother over a simple skinned knee. The pain he felt taken away by her loving embrace. Skinned knees are nothing now. Deep wounds and battle scars he can handle on his own. A testament to his acquired mental strength. He is a man now.
But what can make a grown man cry...are the days he must watch his mother die.
A child again, as his mother, frail and weakened, reaches for his silver covered head and consoles him once again with her undying love. Salted tears breaking the levies, and he is a boy again in the arms of his mother...

Saturday, February 25, 2017

Mr. Brain

Whenever things get hard to explain
I simply summon..."Mr.Brain"
He guides me to my memory fading
If not, he'll hear a soft berading..
"Awe,  come on now Mr. Brain!"
( guide to my life's memory lane)
Take me to the place I'm asking
Where things I can't retrieve are basking...
so merrilly ..while seeming to ignore
my calls to them while they bathe and snore.
"Wake up!"  you rascally thoughts so near
"Get Up!  Get Up!"  and join me here!
Oh, Mr. Brain.. come help me rouse their sleep
Raise those memories buried deep
I'm your cheerleader, I'm your fan!
"Awww , c'mon Mr. Brain!"...I know you can!

Sunday, February 5, 2017

We are Killers! :Your Non-American Life is Worth the Price



Of course we are killers! We entered Iraq because we thought we could get away with it. The justification? To save our rich oil sheik friends in Kuwait? To save the country's poor helpless citizens? Nope! We invaded Iraq ..to preserve the free flow of oil at market prices; the fuel for the fire behind a lustful, boastful, self-righteous American economy and citizenry. We can't be poor and free! We can't be 2nd best and free! Of course we will kill for freedom! It is worth any price! How many innocent Iraqi civilians died in the 100-hour war? You do not know. How many have died since? You do not know.

The reason you don't know isn't from stupidity or from lack of aptitude.
Sometimes 'not knowing' is a matter of convenience. It is a chosen ignorance.

Is there such thing as duty, honor, country...patriotism in a back-ass third world country like Iraq? Are there such things as religious principle? Are there mothers, ..fathers, children , saints or angels? There has been a repudiation and smug unwillingness to acknowledge the rest of the world's cultural, racial, religious and genetically evoluted differences.
We killed for oil. We killed for lust and greed, under the guise of patriotism and freedom. What price might the rest of the world have to pay, for our illusion of freedom?
https://youtu.be/_xq2ttQ-788

Tweeting Trump


If Tweeting Trump texted  a tantalizing text on Twitter
How many ticked off Hollywood Hacks  would Tweeting Trump have ticked?



Monday, January 30, 2017

Futile

As summer sets her sun behind
   the earth, the wind ruffles
       the leaves of a tall oak tree
And she is gone.

And we wake in the morning to find
     the new.. although the same tree
       still stands tall and green.

A gasp of  wind
and summer's end blows through him.

And the grand old tree, in his
   majesty, fights the changing scene!

He catches the wind with his great
   limber arms and pushes it back!

Only to find it tiring and futile .

        Alas, his leaves wither and die
        and his arms turn brittle and bare.

And he waits for summer again..

Plains of Egypt

There are things that
     gently rave.. the placid plains
of Egypt
Never noticed
   steadily
          They work.
           They wander.

There are times and places
              steadily making their mold
on us
Often rising
          Leaving
             Many things
                      to ponder..
These things that gently rave.. the placid
                      plains of Egypt
These thing that slowly mold
                    our lives and our souls..







Sunday, January 15, 2017

Treasures Held

Ah!   Living and loving in Daytona Beach!  So many wonderful opportunities to meet some very special people.  Though some are treasures lost,  they are treasures none-the-less!  Glimmering jewels once held in my grasp,  and then suddenly gone with the dawn of a new day...

We  walked the shores...
sorting the jewels and
keeping those that reflected
upon ourselves.

We spent our days...
holding hands and
embracing what little
time we had together.

And I found this...
a golden coin...playing
tag with the waves and
shimmering in the sunlight.

The few remaining grains of sand
slid from beneath our toes..
and fell to the bottom of the hourglass..
and we were forced to part,

Distance became our enemy,
daring us to forget
the magic or our bond
and rip the faith from our souls.

I lived my life...
wanting to cry for you
but trying still to build
on the world I was a part of.    ( S.R. Lee )

When I met you

When I met you, life became exciting!
Everything was new,..when I met you.
Places old to me seemed more inviting!
What was new to you,  was new to me too!

I really did believe in what I was doing
It had purpose, life and hope..and felt secure!
Our love was everything we'd EVER need.
This feeling would not heed the most obscure..
When I met you.

Now your gone,  and life has lost it's meaning
Everything is gray.,  without my love beside me
The ocean and waves that once
ROARED!  with laughter and passion
....are now monotonous waves of pain.

Finally now I'm done with asking "why".
And taking on those writhing tones of pain
They show me that I've rung that endless circle..
What begins on top,  on the bottom must end?

Once I loved life,  and I loved you.
Now there is nothing to fuel my fire, no love
to raise my soul above the pain.