Sunday, January 4, 2015

Men and Love

When my friends and I were younger, and in the dating scene....we would always look for a 2nd glance.You know,...many ladies are masters of using peripheral vision....and would look at you using that subconsciously refined skill, ...and then glance back later. This second glance was an indication that ...at least visually...she had some interest, and you should go talk to her. Of course, opening your mouth and actually attempting a conversation, might weaken that first impression. And then, the often fatal yet necessary trip to the restroom with her girlfriends to discuss your fate. First impressions begin the fantasy that is the first phase of all relationships. Infatuation.
      Then, there came a time when many of the second looks were "dirty" looks. Not realizing we had gotten a bit older and were perhaps eyeballing girls too young for us now. Then came marriage.....for a man , a gigantic leap of faith knowing the odds are against success statistically ( men think in these "logical" terms even though logic does not apply), and that should he become a father, his paternal role may be reduced to strictly a monetary one. Sometimes we marry for love...sometimes for lust...sometimes because of insecurity...or for all of the above. When you are younger, and have security issues, you might marry for sex. Finally! You have found someone who will actually have sex with you! And more than once!
     It's nice to have someone know you, and actually like who you are. A grand compliment...
But it is more than that with men, I find. Women for the most part love and hug each other openly, talk about almost anything to each other, express emotions openly. Men do not. Crying at movies not allowed. No bubble baths alone! The only time in his life that he can express himself by hugging...kissing...actually exposing himself in those ways seemingly instinctive to women...., is when he has found love.
Just a thought. Have a Happy New Year!

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